listening to god

Time to get honest. I hope you all have enjoyed my recent themed posts. Those will be coming for a while. I will fill in the space with things like wake up call tuesday and current statuses of my heart and how it's adjusting.

I'm sorry that I've been so slow on updating how these adjustments have been settling with me. There really hasn't been much to write about, besides the girls. Which is why I started their segment that will have new posts out every Tuesday.

But since I've been here, I guess things have been a little difficult. Which is a long way from where I've been. Today has actually be a much better day. And today was still difficult.

I guess I just miss people.
And my church
And the sun
And my friends
And my family
And walking
And God...

I guess for the past few months things have been really dry between God and I.

He has been trying to get my attention through different people and circumstances, but I always feel like He doesn't hear me and ignores me. But as a great friend of mine told me, He's not the one who doesn't listen to us, we're the ones who don't listen to Him.

So I'm listening to you God. This has been up there with the hardest things I've ever had to do. And I give it to you. Take this deep pain away. Allow me to go through my new everyday life without a stabbing reminder of what I've left behind. Fill those empty spaces with new things. New people. Allow me life to move forward fast, on a roller coaster. And give me the strength to get through these next couple of days, because I know they will be hard since I haven't found where I fit in up here.