They tried to tell me it wouldn't happen. They tried to tell me nothing would be different. They tried to get me to believe a glorious truth that couldn't possibly be. And I gave in a little. Which has caused the reality of my new life to be even more painful.
I love Washington. It's wonderful here. It's beautiful. You never doubt God's goodness, grace, mercy, love, and beauty. It's impossible to when I'm living right in the middle of his outstanding creation. But that doesn't mean I don't miss California. It's not painful. I don't greatly desire to go back. But all the people I left behind aren't able to easily be forgotten.
Ties and bonds have been formed that will last forever. But can they last now?
It's hard for them to with me being so far away. And I told them. I told them it would be different and things would never be the same. But they didn't believe me. And now that it's true, it hurts even more. Because that glimmer of hope had been being held onto so tightly.
This is a tough season. While I don't have an immediate community of friends up here, I have many opportunities for one to be formed. But for 16 years, I had a community, and they haven't grown totally blurry in my rear-view mirror yet. Every day is easier. Every moment is more bearable. My soul is not crushed. My life has not ended. But those moments still come, and I start to wish for those friends who knew what my favorite color is...
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